Friends #1
January 22
The Wisdom Hunter is a devotional to which I subscribe online and recently there have been excellent devotionals on friendship.
Check out the wisdomhunter.com
"Friends Warn Friends" is based on some passages in 1 Samuel.
“Saul told his son Jonathan and all the attendants to kill David. But Jonathan had taken a great liking to David and warned him, “My father Saul is looking for a chance to kill you. Be on your guard tomorrow morning; go into hiding and stay there.” 1 Samuel 19:1-2
“Jonathan said to David, “Go in peace, for we have sworn friendship with each other in the name of the LORD.” 1 Samuel 20:42
Many, many years ago a friend called me to share that she had heard someone, whom I thought was a godly friend and fellow church member, talking about me in a less than friendly manner. She knew I'd invested highly in this relationship and wanted to warn me. A week later, working at a school clothing sale another older Christian friend told me a similar scenario when encountering this individual. So I called this woman and asked if it was true. The insults weren't awful, but they were making fun of me for the way I dressed (usually in designer overalls or kid friendly clothing...this woman dressed magnificently, wore perfect make-up, of which I wore none) and the way I decorated my house (again, not by an interior designer, but crafty and in ways I felt were fun for our children and their friends). Denying none of the comments, her response was that I really shouldn't consider a person who would repeat those things to me as a friend. My intent was to clear the air and continue on in the friendship, but it ended.
Boyd Bailey, the Wisdom Hunter writes:
"Friends warn friends. They warn them of danger to their physical safety. It could be harm from someone who wants to inflict pain or it may be a circumstance that carries economic risk. It may be the discovery of disloyalty from a mutual friend who threatens a coworker’s employment. Loyalty does not withhold information from a friend that can help them make the wisest decision. A loyal friend warns a friend while there is still time to make a safe transition.
Do you have a friend who is gullible about someone else’s good will? Is evil crouching at their door waiting to pounce on their uninformed ego? If so, you may be God’s instrument to instruct them in the way to go. Your friend may be so close to the situation that they have allowed their emotions to cloud their good judgment. Because they trust you, you can help them verify their assumptions. Use your relational equity and assist them in taking a step back to wait and pray."
Most importantly, friends warn friends to not forsake their faith in Jesus Christ.
While I think Mr. Bailey has some excellent points, I think it is alway important, when a "warning" is passed on to go directly to the source. Confrontation in love shows you care about the relationship and especially among believers, God's desire is to see restoration.
Ten years later, the woman I made reference to above, invited me to her home. She had taken on a leadership role in our church and became convicted by the Spirit over what had happened in our relationship. I expressed to her how sad I was that we had missed serving the Lord together all those years and that our children, who had been good friends, missed out on so many things we had done together as families. It ended well, yet the relationship never re-established as her husband took another job out of town.
Mr. Bailey posted another entry this week about the importance of praying for the Holy Spirit to take the lead in a confrontation.
"Most of all prepare your heart in prayer before you confront someone who has hurt you. Spirit-led confrontation gets the best results. Your offender's accountability is ultimately to the Lord. Jesus is their judge, not you, so trust Him to plant the seeds of your sensitive speech into the soil of their soul. They may not own up immediately to their actions, but that is between them and God. Manage your anger productively with caring confrontatio and courageous conversations."
The one who states his case first seems right, until the other comes and examines him.
Proverbs 18:17
Day #16 of Praise
An oldie by Michael W. Smith "Friends"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I2uIIJathUI
The Wisdom Hunter is a devotional to which I subscribe online and recently there have been excellent devotionals on friendship.
Check out the wisdomhunter.com
"Friends Warn Friends" is based on some passages in 1 Samuel.
“Saul told his son Jonathan and all the attendants to kill David. But Jonathan had taken a great liking to David and warned him, “My father Saul is looking for a chance to kill you. Be on your guard tomorrow morning; go into hiding and stay there.” 1 Samuel 19:1-2
“Jonathan said to David, “Go in peace, for we have sworn friendship with each other in the name of the LORD.” 1 Samuel 20:42
Many, many years ago a friend called me to share that she had heard someone, whom I thought was a godly friend and fellow church member, talking about me in a less than friendly manner. She knew I'd invested highly in this relationship and wanted to warn me. A week later, working at a school clothing sale another older Christian friend told me a similar scenario when encountering this individual. So I called this woman and asked if it was true. The insults weren't awful, but they were making fun of me for the way I dressed (usually in designer overalls or kid friendly clothing...this woman dressed magnificently, wore perfect make-up, of which I wore none) and the way I decorated my house (again, not by an interior designer, but crafty and in ways I felt were fun for our children and their friends). Denying none of the comments, her response was that I really shouldn't consider a person who would repeat those things to me as a friend. My intent was to clear the air and continue on in the friendship, but it ended.
Boyd Bailey, the Wisdom Hunter writes:
"Friends warn friends. They warn them of danger to their physical safety. It could be harm from someone who wants to inflict pain or it may be a circumstance that carries economic risk. It may be the discovery of disloyalty from a mutual friend who threatens a coworker’s employment. Loyalty does not withhold information from a friend that can help them make the wisest decision. A loyal friend warns a friend while there is still time to make a safe transition.
Do you have a friend who is gullible about someone else’s good will? Is evil crouching at their door waiting to pounce on their uninformed ego? If so, you may be God’s instrument to instruct them in the way to go. Your friend may be so close to the situation that they have allowed their emotions to cloud their good judgment. Because they trust you, you can help them verify their assumptions. Use your relational equity and assist them in taking a step back to wait and pray."
Most importantly, friends warn friends to not forsake their faith in Jesus Christ.
While I think Mr. Bailey has some excellent points, I think it is alway important, when a "warning" is passed on to go directly to the source. Confrontation in love shows you care about the relationship and especially among believers, God's desire is to see restoration.
Ten years later, the woman I made reference to above, invited me to her home. She had taken on a leadership role in our church and became convicted by the Spirit over what had happened in our relationship. I expressed to her how sad I was that we had missed serving the Lord together all those years and that our children, who had been good friends, missed out on so many things we had done together as families. It ended well, yet the relationship never re-established as her husband took another job out of town.
Mr. Bailey posted another entry this week about the importance of praying for the Holy Spirit to take the lead in a confrontation.
"Most of all prepare your heart in prayer before you confront someone who has hurt you. Spirit-led confrontation gets the best results. Your offender's accountability is ultimately to the Lord. Jesus is their judge, not you, so trust Him to plant the seeds of your sensitive speech into the soil of their soul. They may not own up immediately to their actions, but that is between them and God. Manage your anger productively with caring confrontatio and courageous conversations."
The one who states his case first seems right, until the other comes and examines him.
Proverbs 18:17
Day #16 of Praise
An oldie by Michael W. Smith "Friends"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I2uIIJathUI
